Beginning in elementary school and lasting all through high school, I regularly participated in the often injurious, yet required game of “killball” for P.E. class. Many of you knew this game as dodgeball. In New Jersey, we called things as we saw them. It was “killball.” Our gym teacher did his best (snicker, snicker) to enforce the “no balls thrown at the opposing team’s heads” rule, but at least one kid always walked out of the gymnasium holding his brain-rattled cranium with a giant red circle tattooed on his forehead.
There were two ways to play killball: 1) get out in front with your teammates to nail the toughest opponents before they nailed you or, 2) hide behind your teammates, flat against the back wall to avoid getting hit. There was the front line and then there were the hiders. The hiders prayed not to be noticed and hoped the front line held strong so they could quietly exit the gym claiming victory without injury in a war they really did not wage. But oh, oh, oh, if that front line fell, the exposed hiders met inevitable doom.
It is much the same with Christian men who fail to implement any measure of accountability in their lives. Fear of embarrassment and risk of tainting well crafted self-images, drive men to flee accountability like hiders in “killball.” Secret struggles fester, disguised as little manageable problems that can be easily “handled” alone. “No need to tell anyone, I can beat this,” we tell ourselves as we cling to the back wall, hidden behind a self-created façade of perfection and righteous living. With practice and tenacity, we fool everyone into thinking that everything is okay.
That is until the giant red “killball” of sin comes rocketing in and knocks us flat, leaving everyone wondering how such solid Christian men could have fallen so deeply into sin. Men, this is not how the Lord wants us to live. Sure, it’s difficult fessing up to struggles, iniquities, or neglected responsibilities. The Lord, however, has blessed us with fellow Christian men with whom we can strategize. Let’s get out front with our brothers in arms and be accountable. Pray, get in the Word, and surround yourself with men who will specifically ask you how you are doing in your areas of struggle.
“Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart.” (Eccl. 4:9-10 & 12)
Recomended books about repentance…
Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. — Proverbs 27:17
Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another, so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much. — James 5:16
Coaches know that athletes who train together push one another to greater achievement. When someone else is running alongside, a runner will push a little harder and go a little faster. The same is true in the Lord’s work. That is one reason the Lord sent His disciples out in twos. — Alexander Strauch
If hundreds of thousands of men seriously began to lead their own homes, the impact on America would be far greater than one Christian man leading in the White House. — Steve Farrar
(adapted from a list authored by Chuck Swindoll)
To be asked at each small group meeting in an effort to hold each other accountable to the standard that Jesus Christ our Lord has set before us.
Have you lacked self-control in any area? Have your thoughts, eyes, and relationships remained pure regarding other women?
Is there anyone whom you have dealt with in an un-Christ-like manner? Have you ruined your chance to witness to an unbeliever because of your attitude or behavior? Do you need to seek someone’s forgiveness?
Have you prayed and been in the Word regularly?
How is your relationship with your wife? Have you served her? Spent quality time with her? What will you do over the next week to fulfill one act of sacrificial love for her?
Did you spend enough time with your kids? How are you training them?
Have you put yourself first in any way?
Have you lied to me/us about any of the questions asked?