Keep Your Promise

September, 2005

by: Brock Bolde

It was over 11 years ago that I exchanged vows with my beautiful bride — Cristina. The day itself was a blur but I can still remember taking her hands and gazing into her eyes while making the pledge to “comfort her, love her, honor and keep her in sickness and in health; and forsaking all others, to be committed to her as long as I was living.” This was a promise that I made not only to her but also to God and by God’s grace it has been a promise that I have kept. And it is this promise, to her and to God, that drives me to work on my marriage every day; it is this promise that prompts me to make sure that I am living with my wife in an understanding way; it is this promise that pushes me to deny myself such that I might love her as Christ loved the Church. But I am not the only one to have made this promise. Each one of you that is married has made this same promise. You have all promised your spouse and God that you would be committed to your marriage partner to such a degree that the only thing that would separate you would be death itself. So let me ask you — how are you doing in regards to keeping that promise? Are you so committed? Is your commitment such that it serves as a testimony to your children? Do your neighbors see a difference in the way that you interact with your spouse? Are people in general able to see the good works from your marriage—such that they give glory to your heavenly Father?

Those of us who are married are seeing a horrendous attack against marriage. Too many people, even within the Church, are forsaking their vows and abandoning their marriages. Too many men and women are letting other things take priority over their marriages. As those who have trusted in the work of Jesus Christ we cannot let this happen to us. We live in a day and age where there are many things vying for our time and attention. And while many of these things are okay and maybe even good, they must not allow us to neglect our marriages. We must be a people who work hard to have the type of relationships with our spouses that God’s Word calls us to have. It is not easy for a man to love his wife as Christ loved the Church. It is not easy for a woman to submit to her husband with a chaste and respectful attitude. These things take work; they require supernatural resources if they are to be carried out in a person’s life. They will not just happen on their own. If you and I are to have the kind of marriages that bring glory to God then we must give them the time and attention that they deserve. If we want to help our children to see how two sin–cursed individuals find a mutual joy and satisfaction in marriage, then we must work to keep our relationships fresh and thriving. One of the ways in which we do this is by making our spouse the most important person in our lives, second only to our devotion to Jesus Christ. This means that we must spend one on one time with our spouses; we must continue to date and study our spouses so that we know what makes them tick; we must strive to know them better than we even know ourselves. By doing this, we are able to have the kinds of marriages that bring glory to God.

Everyone who is married has committed themselves to love, honor, and cherish their spouse. It is a commitment that they have made before their spouse and God and as such it is a commitment that needs to be honored. The question remains — how are you doing at keeping your promise? How are you doing at making your spouse the most important person in your life next to Jesus Christ? Let me encourage us all to take some time this month to sit down with our spouses to answer these all important questions.