Getting over the Hump

July, 2006

by: Dave Hintz

Out of the blue, a friend calls, wanting to get together for lunch. Naturally, you accept. Over sandwiches at a quiet restaurant she asks, “I know you’re a Christian, and I want you to tell me how I can get to heaven.” Now in this dream situation, in which a spiritual conversation falls into your lap, most of you would be willing and able to share the basic truths about salvation, whether by going through a gospel tract or showing your friend key passages in the Bible. But from my experience, the hardest part of evangelism is not explaining the atonement, but rather shifting the conversation towards spiritual things in the first place. How do we go from talking about baseball, work, and kids, to God and their need of salvation? In this article I want to give some suggestions to help you strike up spiritual conversations with your friends and neighbors.

As a rule, what do people like talking about the most? That’s right, themselves. Thus, asking good and thought-provoking questions about someone’s beliefs, ideas, and experiences is an excellent way to steer a conversation towards spiritual things. For instance, when talking to coworkers in the office, ask what they did the past weekend. When they ask the same, mention that you went to church. Then ask, “Do you ever go to church?” or, “Do you ever think about spiritual things?” At this point, follow up and ask questions like:

1. Do you believe in God? What is your conception of Him?
2. Where do you get your information about God?
3. In your opinion, how does someone get to heaven?
4. In your opinion, what is sin? Would you consider yourself to be a sinner?
5. If someone asked you how to become a Christian and did not want to talk to a minister or read a book, what would you say to him?

Remember, your goal at this point is to be a listener. Don’t march through these questions with an agenda, but seek to understand where they are coming from, asking clarifying questions as necessary. As you take a genuine interest in their spiritual opinions, your friend will get less defensive and warm up to talking about these things. Non-Christians really appreciate an open dialogue about religion, as it gives them the opportunity to think through their own religious convictions. When you have thoroughly talked through the issues, ask them, “Would you like to know what the Bible says about these issues?” Common courtesy dictates that if you listen to someone else talk about their beliefs for an hour, they should allow you to share your perspective for a few minutes at least. Further, many people might be interested to see how their belief system lines up with the Bible’s. In my own experience people tend to be highly receptive to at least listening to what the Bible has to say when I listen to them first.

Another approach can be used when a friend or a co-worker shares a need (i.e. their husband is going to be out of town, their mom has cancer, etc.). Tell them that you will pray for them. In my college days several guys on my floor would swing by my room and ask me to pray for their tests. Apparently, they always did better when I interceded for them, so they tossed out the rabbit’s foot and asked me to pray. About a week later, I would approach them and ask them how they did, and then I would tell them that I am praying for their spiritual life as well, and ask, “How is that going?” This naturally led into a quality conversation. Even if things don’t go their way, it will mean a lot to your non-Christian friends and neighbors to know that you are praying for them.

None of these strategies are foolproof and you may adopt a different method which works best for you. But remember this: you will not become adept at transitioning to the gospel until you practice doing so. The more you share the Gospel, the more comfortable you will be in initiating conversations. And the more comfortable you are in the midst of the conversations, the easier it will be for the unbeliever to open up. You may stumble and fall a few times, but by God’s grace and your perseverance He will make you into a lifestyle evangelist.