The Need for Discernment

April, 2008

by: Brock Bolde

In the Word of God we are told that “all things are lawful, but not all things are profitable” (1 Corinthians 10:23). Helping our children to understand this important concept is critical to their growth in Jesus Christ. We live in a culture that is constantly bombarding our children with products that are flashy, appealing to the senses, and terribly misleading. A stroll down any toy aisle will give you a glimpse into the war that is being waged for the minds of our children. For those of you with daughters, stop and look at how the dolls are dressed (the latest and greatest Bratz line is even starting to put babies in lingerie type dress.) If you have boys, look at the physical features of the action figures or the violent nature of the video games that your son wants to play. All of these “toys” are teaching your child something and the question that you must ask yourself is — “What are they teaching my child?” There is a battle going on for the minds of our children and my greatest fear is that many of us are being duped into thinking that it’s not that big of a deal! Like the frog in the kettle that is ever so subtly lulled to sleep in the warm water until it is eventually boiled to death, many in the Christian community are failing to see the changes that are taking place in the toys, TV shows, video games, music and books of our time. Many of us are unknowingly leading our children into a world that contradicts the very faith that we are attempting to train our children up in.

As parents, we must keep a watchful eye out for things that will lead our children astray; we must get more actively involved in screening the things that our children are playing with, listening to, reading, or watching. Let us never forget that “[y]our adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour” (1 Peter 5:8). We must be advocates for our children – guarding what goes into their minds. This is much easier when our children are very young because we can simply keep them away from such things. But as our children get older, we are not able to be with them in every situation and circumstance, thus it becomes critical that they know how to think for themselves. As parents, we must teach our children discernment so that they might make God-honoring choices whether we are with them or not. We must help them to be as “shrewd as serpents but as innocent as doves” (Matthew 10:16). One way that we can practically do this is by asking our children questions. Whether you’re reading with them, playing with them, or simply watching TV with them, don’t hesitate to ask some questions. Some sample questions might be:

• What is the subject/point of this toy, TV show, song, book, or game? Would God be happy with what these things talk about? Why or why not?
• Do the characters in this TV show, song, book, or game like the things that God likes? Do they make fun of people in authority (parents, teachers, etc.)? What does the Word of God have to say about our attitudes towards those who are in authority over us? (Rom. 13; Eph. 6:1-3; Heb. 13:17).
• How do these characters solve their problems? Do they solve them by lying or by doing something wrong? Do these characters get in trouble for doing something wrong; are there consequences for wrong choices? Would Jesus watch, listen to, or play with these things? Why or why not?

As much as we must ask these types of questions to our children, we must also ask them to ourselves. The best way to teach our children discernment is to practice it before them. Let us never think that we (as adults) are capable of filling our minds with junk without suffering any ill-effects. Discernment begins with us taking the log out of our own eye before helping our children to remove the speck that is in theirs. God commands us to train up our children in the way they should go (Proverbs 22:6), this includes equipping them with discernment so that they might “approve the things that are excellent, in order to be sincere and blameless until the day of Christ” (Philippians 1:10).